How to Engage Diverse Donors With Authenticity in Major Gift Fundraising
Scaling Major Gifts. Strategies, action steps, and ideas for scaling major gifts by Tammy Zonker, Major Gift Expert & Keynote Speaker.
If you've ever wondered how to build genuine major gift relationships with donors whose culture, identity, or community differs from your own, the answer starts with curiosity over assumption and relationship over representation. Inclusive fundraising in 2026 means treating every donor as a whole person with their own story, not a box to check on a diversity slide. If you lead major gifts, development, or a small nonprofit team, this is for you.
After reading this, you'll be able to spot the missteps that quietly push diverse donors away, practice a few small shifts in how you listen and engage, and start the internal work that makes your external outreach believable.
Let’s get into it
A colleague told me about a gala her organization hosted last year. They had invited leaders from three different cultural communities to "represent diversity" on stage, then never followed up with a single one of them afterward. No coffee. No tour. No real conversation about what those leaders cared about. Six months later, none of them had given a gift, and one told a mutual friend the event felt like being used as a backdrop.
Compare that to a major gift officer I worked with who took a different path. She spent four months simply getting to know the elders in a Vietnamese-American community her organization served, with no ask attached. She attended a cultural festival. She asked questions and let silence sit instead of rushing to fill it. When she finally invited one family to consider a gift, they said yes within the week, and brought two more families with them the following year. Same goal. Completely different posture.
That's the heart of inclusive fundraising. It isn't a campaign theme or a single event. It's a daily discipline of curiosity, listening, and shared leadership that shapes how you build relationships with every donor, especially those whose lived experience differs from your own.
What to focus on next week
Notice your assumptions before a donor visit. Ask yourself what you expect this person to care about, and where that expectation came from.
Audit your last five donor touchpoints with diverse donors. Were they invited to give input, or only invited to give money?
Watch for tokenism traps. A single photo, a single panel seat, or a single "diversity ask" without ongoing relationship is extraction, not inclusion.
Practice one open-ended question you can use in your next donor conversation, something that invites a donor to teach you about their values and community rather than confirm what you already believe.
Use AI to research context, not to write your relationship. A quick summary of a community's history or giving traditions can prepare you. It should never replace listening to the actual person in front of you.
A Quick Story
A client of mine leads a small arts nonprofit and wanted to deepen ties with a Black-led business association in her city. Instead of pitching a sponsorship, she asked the association's president if she could simply attend their monthly meeting as a guest, with no agenda. She did that for three months. By the fourth meeting, members were asking her questions about the mission. One business owner ended up not just giving a gift, but joining the board's development committee. She told me later, "I didn't go in trying to get something. I went in trying to belong to something."
Try this next week
Pick one donor relationship where you suspect you've been making assumptions about what they care about. Schedule a conversation built entirely around listening.
Review your donor materials (case statements, gift proposals, event invitations) for language, imagery, or examples that quietly assume one cultural default. Note one thing to revise.
Ask one trusted colleague or board member from a different background than yours to tell you honestly where your organization's outreach feels extractive rather than relational.
Want to take a deeper dive?
This week's episode of The Intentional Fundraiser Podcast, Inclusive Major Gifts in Practice, I walk you through the difference between inclusive and extractive donor engagement, the common missteps that erode trust, and the internal shifts that make your outreach believable.
Listen to the full episode below.
I’d love to hear from you
Where have you seen inclusive fundraising done well, or seen it go wrong? Connect with me on LinkedIn and tell me what you noticed. I read every note, and your stories shape what I cover next.
This work is slow and it's worth it. Every donor deserves to be seen as a full person, not a representative of a category. Start with one relationship and one honest conversation this week. That's enough to begin.
Keep scaling,
Tammy Zonker
Author of Calling All Heroes
Founder + President of Fundraising Transformed
President of Modern Institute for Charitable Giving
Subscribe to The Intentional Fundraiser Podcast
Reserve your spot at our upcoming Excellence in Major Gift Fundraising Seminar
Frequently Asked Questions
Q1. Who is this approach best suited for?
This approach is designed for major gift officers, development directors, executive directors, and board members who want to build donor relationships that are genuinely inclusive rather than performative. It works especially well if you already have an existing donor base and a willingness to look honestly at where your current outreach may be unintentionally narrow.
Q2. How much time should I expect this to take each week?
Most fundraisers can get started with about 1 to 3 hours per week focused on relationship building and internal review. The more important piece is consistency. Protect that time so it becomes a habit, not a one-time initiative tied to a single event or campaign.
Q3. What if my organization is small and I wear multiple hats?
The principles still apply. You may need to scale the tactics. Start with 3 to 5 donor relationships where you want to build trust across cultural or identity differences, rather than trying to overhaul your entire donor base at once. Expand as you build confidence and capacity.
Q4. How do I know if it's working?
Look for early signals like donors sharing more personal context with you, community leaders making warm introductions on your behalf, or staff and board members raising honest feedback about language and policy without fear. Over time, you should see this reflected in stronger donor retention across diverse donor segments, more multi-year gifts, and a board and staff that better reflects the communities you serve.
Q5. Where does AI fit into this, if at all?
AI is there to reduce friction, not replace your relationships. Use it to research cultural context or giving traditions before a meeting, summarize internal policy language for clarity, or draft a first pass of donor communications you then personalize. Keep the human work of listening, discernment, and relationship-building firmly in your hands.