Make Your Discovery Calls Feel Natural Again
Scaling Major Gifts. Strategies, action steps, and ideas for scaling major gifts by Tammy Zonker, Major Gift Expert & Keynote Speaker.
You feel the pressure to qualify donors fast in 2026.
Budgets are tight, boards want forecasts, and donors expect personalization every time.
Scripted discovery calls can start to feel like an interrogation, for you and for them.
This week, I want to help you redesign those conversations so they feel more like mutual exploration and less like a checklist.
What to focus on next week
Shift your goal from “qualify this donor” to “understand this person’s story, values, and timing.” When you focus on their world first, you still get the qualification data, and the donor leaves feeling respected.
Use a simple four-part structure for each discovery call: warm context, 2 to 4 curiosity questions, deep listening, and one clear next step. This helps you stay present while still moving the relationship forward.
Prepare a short “call purpose” line you can say in one breath. For example, “I wanted to thank you for your support and learn more about what matters most to you in our work.” This sort of opener reduces defensiveness and sets a collaborative tone.
Focus your questions on experience, values, and fit, not on prying into wealth. Ask about their connection to the mission and how they like to engage, then gently explore capacity once you have rapport and permission.
Plan ahead for follow-up using AI. Instead of typing during the conversation, jot a few keywords afterward, then use an AI tool to help you turn your rough notes into a clear, donor-centered contact report and a short follow-up email outline.
A quick story
A development director I worked with had a list of 40 “qualified” prospects who had given mid-level gifts for several years. She felt anxious before every discovery call and stuck closely to a script that focused on capacity questions. Donors gave short answers, calls felt stiff, and almost none of those relationships moved forward.
We redesigned her approach with a mutual exploration mindset. She opened each call by thanking them for their past giving and sharing one short impact story that connected to their previous gifts. Then she used a small set of open questions to understand their journey and values. She took minimal notes during the call and used AI afterward to clean up her contact reports and highlight themes.
Within one quarter, she had fewer, but far richer, conversations. Several donors shared life stories and future plans that had never surfaced before, and one long-time supporter signaled interest in a planned gift after feeling truly heard for the first time. The director felt calmer, better prepared, and more confident about which donors to prioritize for deeper cultivation.
Try this next week
Redesign your discovery call outline
Set up a one-page template for your calls with four headings: “Warm context,” “Curiosity questions,” “Listening notes,” and “Next step.” Under each heading, add only a few bullets, not a full script. This simple tool keeps you focused on the donor, not on your nervousness.
Use these five open-ended questions
Choose two or three that fit your context and practice saying them in your own voice. You do not need to use all of them in one call.
“Can you tell me about your journey with our organization so far?”
“When you think about our mission, what part resonates most with you these days?”
“What experiences in your life have most shaped how you think about giving?”
“How do you like to be involved with causes you care about, for example, visits, small groups, data, stories?”
“Looking ahead a few years, what kind of impact would you feel proud to help make through philanthropy?”
For each question, pause, listen, and reflect back one or two key phrases you heard. That reflection is what builds trust.
Capture notes in a donor-friendly way and use AI after
Immediately after the call, spend 5 to 10 minutes writing quick bullet notes on what you heard about their story, values, capacity signals, and preferred engagement. Then paste those bullets into an AI tool and ask for a concise, objective summary in 2 to 3 paragraphs, plus three suggested next steps. Use that summary to update your CRM and to draft a short, personalized thank-you email that references their specific interests.
How to define a “successful” discovery call
Success is not only a scheduled visit or a large immediate gift. In major gifts, discovery calls are working when:
You learned at least one concrete thing about the donor’s story, values, or giving priorities that you did not know before.
You clarified their preferred communication style and how often they want to hear from you.
You identified a realistic next step that fits their interest level, such as a tour, an introduction to a program leader, or a follow-up call later in the year.
You captured clean notes, summarized with AI or by hand, and translated those notes into one or two planned moves in your CRM.
When you define success this way, you can relax a bit. Your focus becomes learning, documenting, and advancing the relationship in a way that fits the donor, rather than pushing toward a premature ask.
Want to take a deeper dive?
This week on The Intentional Fundraiser Podcast, I walk through the “Discovery That Builds Trust, Not Pressure” framework in more detail. You will hear practical examples of questions in different settings, ways to handle donors who are short on time, and simple AI workflows to keep your notes and follow-up tight.
If you want discovery conversations that feel more natural and still move major gifts forward, this episode will support you.
I’d love to hear from you
Connect with me on LinkedIn and share with me one discovery question you plan to use next week, or how you currently define a successful discovery call on your team. I read your messages, and they shape future newsletters and episodes.
You do work that changes lives, and discovery calls are a big part of that. Give yourself permission to slow the pace, listen deeply, and trust that consistent, thoughtful conversations will build the kind of major donor relationships you want.
Keep scaling,
Tammy Zonker
Author of Calling All Heroes
Founder of Fundraising Transformed
President of Modern Institute for Charitable Giving