Nothing Stands Between Nana and My Grandbabies
Scaling Major Gifts. Strategies, action steps, and ideas for scaling major gifts by Tammy Zonker, Major Gift Expert & Keynote Speaker.
The Balancing Act: Leadership, Legacy, and Love
If you’ve ever tried to juggle the demands of leading a nonprofit initiative while pursuing a passion project, you know firsthand the tightrope we walk. As someone who’s spent nearly 30 years in the trenches of major gift fundraising and nonprofit leadership, I thought I’d seen it all—until I decided to write my first book, Calling All Heroes: Combining the Best of Donor-Centered and Community-Centered Fundraising for Greater Impact. Let me tell you: nothing quite prepares you for the marathon of authorship. Yet, through it all, one thing remained non-negotiable—spending quality time with my grandbabies, Hudson and Grady.
While the purpose of my Scaling Major Gifts newsletter is to share my hard-won insights, lived experiences, and lessons learned to help you grow your major gifts program, I wanted to share with you something a little more personal in this edition.
Whether you’re writing a book, launching a capital campaign, managing a major donor portfolio, or facilitating a board retreat, the challenges are universal: time scarcity, emotional toll, and sacrifices and trade-offs. Sound familiar? This article is for my fellow executive directors, major gift officers, development directors, fundraisers, volunteers, and board members who are striving to make a difference while balancing the many hats you wear.
The Uncharted Territory of Writing a Book
Writing a book may be one of the most challenging professional endeavors you can undertake. Despite decades of experience in fundraising, training, and strategic planning, nothing quite compared to the months of:
Planning and outlining chapters
Conducting interviews and deep research
Writing, rewriting, and then rewriting again
Seeking copyright permissions and navigating legalities
Managing rounds of copyediting and proofreading
Launching a full-scale marketing campaign
I quickly realized that writing a book isn’t just about putting words on a page. It’s about telling a story that resonates, educates, and inspires readers on their journey to the next best version of themselves. According to a survey by Digital Book World, over 97% of people who start writing a book never finish it. I get it! The process is grueling, often lonely, and demands a level of persistence I hadn’t anticipated.
Common Pain Points: What We All Face
Whether you’re writing a book, launching a capital campaign, or managing a board meeting, the challenges are universal:
Time Scarcity. We’re all stretched thin. Many fundraisers and nonprofit leaders I train say time constraints are their biggest challenge. For me, writing often meant late nights and very early mornings, squeezing in edits between capital campaign advisory calls and family commitments.
Emotional Toll. The pressure to “get it right” can be overwhelming. I’ve found that perfectionism is rampant in our sector—we care deeply, and it shows. But this drive can lead to burnout. The State of Nonprofits 2024: What Funders Need to Know, by The Center for Effective Philanthropy, reports that 95% of all leaders surveyed expressed some level of concern about burnout.
Sacrifices and Trade-Offs. Many activities and practices were rescheduled, delayed, or canceled for the sake of meeting book deadlines. But not everything is negotiable. For me, spending time with my grandbabies is sacred. Our Tuesday after-school pickups, Friday night sleepovers at Nana’s, and hosting Sunday brunch for family never missed a beat.
Lessons Learned: What Matters Most
After months of hard work and determination, I finished my first book, Calling All Heroes: Combining the Best of Donor-Centered and Community-Centered Fundraising for Greater Impact. And yes, I’ve already started my next book for modern fundraisers and nonprofit leaders. Stay tuned! Through this journey, here’s what I’ve learned:
Prioritize What’s Sacred. No matter the deadline, I protected my time with Hudson and Grady. Those moments reminded me why we do what we do. In my experience, holding onto your “why”—whether it’s family, faith, or a personal passion—fuels your resilience.
Embrace Imperfection. I’ve found that striving for progress, not perfection, is the key to moving forward. One approach I’ve seen work well is setting aspirational yet realistic goals and celebrating small wins along the way.
Lean on Your Community. Writing a book, like leading a nonprofit or large campaign, is not a solo act. I’m deeply grateful to colleagues, mentors, friends, and my team at Wiley for their feedback and encouragement. It made all the difference in the world—having a supportive community not only kept me motivated but also provided invaluable insights and reassurance when I needed it most.
A Call to Action: Share Your Journey
If you’re facing your own mountain—be it a book, a big campaign, or a new initiative—know that you’re not alone. The road can be tough, but the rewards are immeasurable. I salute and deeply respect all authors, nonprofit leaders, and anyone who dares to create something new.
I’d love to hear from you:
What’s your “non-negotiable”?
How do you balance professional demands with personal commitments?
What lessons have you learned from your own journey?
Drop me a note, share your story, or ask a question. Let’s continue to learn and grow together.
And if you’d like to learn more about my new book, Calling All Heroes: Combining the Best of Donor-Centered and Community-Centered Fundraising for Greater Impact, visit https://callingallheroesbook.com and pre-order your copy today.
Keep scaling,
Tammy Zonker
Author, Major Gift Expert & Keynote Speaker
President, Fundraising Transformed
President, Modern Institute for Charitable Giving
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